Spirituality passion and depth in our lives

Behind the quest for spirituality lies a growing need for passion and depth in our lives. That’s why, David Elkins argues, psychotherapy still has a thing or two to learn from religion.

By David N. Elkins Ph.D.

 

DURING THAT FIRST THERAPY SESSION 20 YEARS AGO HE LISTENED TO ME AS NO ONE had ever listened before. I told my story, the one I had rehearsed, but he heard the truth anyway. Near the end of the session, he said gently, “You are spiritually hungry.” I began to cry. Me, a grown 31-year-old man. Because somewhere, deep inside, I knew he was right.

For the next two years, under the guise of psychotherapy, I was taught how to care for and feed my soul. The psychologist gave me the skills I needed to build a life of passion and depth. Today, as a clinical psychologist and university professor, I share this wisdom with clients and students because I believe that spirituality is essential to human happiness and mental health.

One of my graduate students told me she had gone for a walk on the beach in the late afternoon. As the sun was setting, she climbed onto a boulder at the water’s edge. Gazing out to sea, she felt herself slowly becoming one with nature–with the sun descending toward the horizon, the waves crashing at her feet, the pastel colors that streaked the western sky. She said, “In that moment I felt eternity. I knew these things had gone on for millions of years before I came and that they would go on for millions of years after I’m gone. It felt good to be alive, to be part of all this. I was deeply moved and began to cry.”

Contemplation, meditation, prayer, rituals and other spiritual practices have the power to release the “life force” in the deepest levels of the human psyche, levels that secular interventions cannot reach. Indeed, new evidence shows that religious and spiritual interventions can help when everything else has failed.

I encourage clients and students to first figure out what moves them deeply–whether it’s Beethoven, Garth Brooks or the Grateful Dead, a hike in the mountains, or a day in an art gallery. Then, I help them design a regular, structured program to incorporate these activities into their life. Read More

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